Friday, February 11, 2011

Do-it-yourself Devilry

I know that this one's late in the day. It happens. Don't judge.

I've been thinking about supervillains recently. You read that right. Supervillains. Now, I'm sure there are some of you who, at this point, look like an aborigine confronted with a Jackson Pollack original.

Have you gotten it out of your system yet? Do you want to hear WHY I've been thinking about supervillains?

Easy. I think I can do it. The whole 'supervillain' thing. I think I'd do a damn sight better than most of the idiots portrayed in comics, movies, and TV, too.

Let's assume that I have possession of my own country. (Casvellia) I have a stable economy, an industrious populace, oh, and don't forget, MY GODDAMN LEGIONS OF EVIL. Now, I think that there are several things that could be improved, at least to the extant that I won't have spandex-rife crusaders knocking down my door at 2 in the morning. Let me try a small list:

1. Don't torture my populace. As a matter of fact, I think I'd make sure they all had free high-speed internet. Distractions to keep them happy. I need these people on MY SIDE. That way, when Captain Crusaderkins shows up, they'll hang him without my intervention.

2. My LEGIONS OF EVIL would not wear masks and have a strict training regimen, with an emphasis on marksmanship.

3. I would never show up to a UN meeting wearing a color-coordinated outfit. This never ends well.

This is just the ideas I came up with in 5 minutes. Anyone got any more?

Have a good one


  1. Hm... how 'bout:
    * Always do your evil deeds 35 minutes before you intended to, in case any "heroes" shows up!

    Anyway, don't worry about that "crazy" stuff.
    As I once heard my mentor say:
    "Sanity - Just another human limitation!"

    Btw, nice post! :)

  2. If I were a supervillain, I would remain in power despite the cry of my populace for my resignation! Jus' sayin, Mubarak is no supervillain.

  3. @weltanschauung

    lol, i would do exactly the same shit.

    But Mubarak was an evil person, that forced tensions with bordering nations. He was a fascist SOB with a God complex

  4. seems great you should write a book about it lol